she stayed with us most of the time.
I looked at her, confused, “What are you doing
here?”
She hadn’t knocked on my door in years.
Joy hesitated, frowning at me. After a while,
she said, “Why are you going to UCLA?”
Seeing nineteen–year–old Joy again, I just
narrowed my eyes.
She was pretty, and had tons of admirers at
school and outside.
It wasn’t an exaggeration to say that any guy
would fall for her at first sight.
But I didn’t seem to feel anything for her
anymore.
Last time, I got in a car accident on the way to
see Joy.
3
She said she had a business banquet and would
be back late.
But she didn’t come back until midnight.
I called her, but she didn’t answer. She didn’t
respond to my toxts either.
Worried something had happened, I rushed out.
I had a bad cold at the time, and I was weak
and feverish.
7:21
70
But I still dragged my sick body out to find her.
And that’s how I died.
When I got to the hospital, only my daughter
was there.
My daughter called her a million times, but she
still didn’t answer.
In the end, when I was about to die, my daughter, worried I wouldn’t rest in peace, told me that Joy had gone to the banquet with her
ex–boyfriend.
At that moment, the last bit of energy I had, the
thing that kept me wanting to see Joy one last
time, vanished.
Thinking about it, my heart ached.
Looking at Joy again, my eyes turned cold.
“^/hat do
corn whorn I and Didn’t
<
70
“What do you care where I go? Didn’t you say you didn’t want me to apply to the same college as you? I’m doing what you want. I won’t bother
you anymore, and I hope you won’t show up in my life.”
She looked shocked.
Before she could say anything, I slammed the door shut in her face.
I took a few deep breaths to calm down and tried not to think about the past.
In the middle of the night, I was sound asleep when my dad woke me up and dragged me to the living room.
Joy was sitting on the couch, sobbing softly.
My dad frowned at me, “Why are you going to UCLA? What about Joy? Are you going to leave her to go to NYU alone?”
<
“Change your application right now, and go to
NYU with Joy. Don’t you love her? Can you
really let her go to a different state by herself?”
Looking at Joy’s red eyes, I would’ve felt
terrible in the past.
I would’ve done anything to make her happy,
even cut off my own arm and boil it into soup
for her.
But now, I didn’t feel any sympathy for her.
Was it because I raised my voice a little?
Back then, she was a lot harsher with me.
Thinking about that, I got angry.
I started arguing with my dad.
My mom heard the commotion and rushed to
the living room.
r
But she sided with my dad, criticizing me.
My mom pulled my dad behind her and said I shouldn’t talk back to him.
Even when she argued with me, her own son,
my mom protected my dad.
Even though I was being scolded, I felt a deep
sense of disappointment.
Before, when I had a conflict with someone, Joy
never said a word to help me. She even took
the other person’s side.
I wanted Joy to stand by me, even if it was just
to glare at the other person. But she never did.
I guess I failed in my past life.
Even my partner wouldn’t stand with me.
く
No, that was just wishful thinking. Did Joy ever
see me as her partner?
My eyes turned red, and I started to cry.
It seemed like I was always alone.
4
My parents saw that something was wrong and
came over to comfort me.
“Son, what’s wrong? Don’t scare me. What
happened? Tell me.”
I shook my head, feeling dizzy.
Joy saw me stagger and stood up to support
- me.
I pushed her hand away.
Seeing her cold face, I felt disgusted.
<
Then, I looked at my parents and said firmly,
“Mom, Dad, I won’t go to NYU, even if it kills
- me. I’m going to UCLA.”
“And don’t try to get me and Joy together
anymore. The person she likes has never been
me, and I don’t want to like her anymore. I don’t
want to see her ever again.”
Joy looked at me, shocked, her eyes wide.
She probably didn’t expect me to stop fawning
over her after all these years.
I didn’t care anymore.
I snorted and went back to my room. Grabbing
my suitcase, I left that night.
I could hear my dad yelling behind me.
“Ungrateful son!”
