Bumping down the road in Grandpa’s truck, I got to the country.
100
It wasn’t the city, but it wasn’t as bad as Ashley
said.
Grandpa got my room ready.
It had a wood bed, a desk, and a bookcase.
The room smelled like wood, which I liked.
Lunnacked
<
I unpacked.
Grandpa was already back from working in the fields, carrying a hoe and a piece of meat.
He didn’t say anything, but I knew he bought it for me.
Grandpa didn’t talk much, but kept piling meat
on my plate.
“Wash the dishes when you’re done, the country doesn’t have fancy dishwashers,” he said.
Before he finished talking, I went to wash the
dishes.
Grandpa grunted. “The road’s long, so buckle
in, you’re in for a ride.”
I knew he was just putting on a show.
I caught a cold the next day.
9:34
100
There was a new blanket on my bed that night.
The bookcase was full of books.
Lots of old history books, some with torn
covers.
Grandpa wanted me to read them, but history
was boring.
Grandpa would drag me outside at night,
pointing at the stars, telling me stories about
heroes.
Slowly, I started to like it.
Grandpa also taught me how to check the dirt,
and he called me dumb when I did it wrong.
Then he would write down my mistakes in his
notebook.
<
100
Life was rough, but Grandpa was good to me,
even if he didn’t say it.
He thought I might miss Mom, so he asked the
neighbors to check in on me.
Summer vacation went by and it was time to go back to school.
I found him cleaning the mud off his truck.
Grandpa dropped me off at school, and I saw Ashley and Mom.
Ashley walked out of a fancy car, carrying a purse, looking like a queen.
When Ashley saw me, she tried to grab my
hand, but she stopped and covered her nose. “Sis, you smell like manure!”
I covered my nose too, because she smelled
like perfume.
9:34
100
Ashley pretended to be surprised. “How are you
getting to school? I thought your grandpa
collected antiques? I came in a million–dollar car!”
She went over and said hi to the other rich kids.
Ashley turned to me. “We’re not in the same world anymore. Dad takes me to parties, unlike you who is in the dirt all the time.”
She stepped on my shoe. “That’s so dirty, my shoes are better.”
I didn’t get mad.
I knelt down and wiped off my shoes with my
sleeve.
“Are you taking out your anger from living in the
Henderson household on me?”
Ashley laughed. “You’re wrong! You should
く
9:34
worry about yourself!”
I could see that I hit a nerve.
I went home from school and wrote my
homework.
100
I heard a knock on the door, and there was a shoebox on the porch.
The neighbor’s grandson goes to my school,
and I heard him talking about getting new shoes
for the school.
Before I could say anything, the shoes were
already at the door.
My heart was filled with warmth.
In the Henderson family, they only wanted me
to follow their lead and do as I was told.
During my adolescence, my digestive system
We wreck
<
was a wreck.
Every day when I got home from school, Mr.
Henderson would pull out all kinds of different
liquor bottles and force them down my throat.
And every time he poured me a drink, I had to
sweeten the deal with flattery.
And on the weekends, I was stuck with
“ballroom dancing” lessons.
What they called “ballroom dancing” was
nothing but a ploy to angle the dress in such a
way so that the guys could get a peep show of
what they wanted, while they roamed their
hands all over you.
I did ask Mom if this wasn’t some sort of
perverted, twisted form of self–degradation.
I remember her putting her hand on her
protruding pregnant belly, and then staring at
<
9:34
me coldly.
“All of this is for your betterment, you understand? So do yourself a favor and
toughen up, will you?”
