She just laughed, “Have you ever thought that she might like you, but is just a little slow to warm up? After all, she lost her parents and didn’t get enough love.”
I shook my head, chuckling bitterly.
“No way. You’re kidding.”
Not enough love? Wasn’t I giving her enough?
I was ready to give her my heart.
If she still didn’t have enough love, then what
was love?
Last time was a disaster. I wasn’t going down that road again.
Soon, it was time for the first day of school. I
had my mom mail me my acceptance letter.
But she sent me two.
One was Joy’s!
6
She had applied to the same college as me!
She gave up NYU!
My head spun.
Why?
Why did she, who had never loved me, have to
come and mess with me?
A knock on the door.
<
7:22
I knew it was Joy.
69
With my parents‘ resources, they could easily
find out where I was.
When I opened the door, Joy stood there with a backpack.
I sneered, “Last time, I gave my life for you.
Even if you never loved me, did you have to
come and torture me like this?”
Tears welled up in her eyes.
“Gus, can you give me a chance to explain?”
“No.”
I refused flat out.
“Joy, I liked you, I loved you, last time. But
that’s all in the past. The day I went to find you
and got hit by a for my love for you dind
<
and got hit by a car, my love for you died.
I don’t care if you feel guilty or whatever. All I
want is for you to disappear from my world.
Okay?”
She grabbed me.
“No. I don’t want to leave you.”
Her tears soaked my shirt.
I couldn’t say I didn’t feel anything when I saw
her crying. After all, I had loved her for decades.
If she had given me a tiny bit of love before, I
would’ve loved her for another lifetime, even if
it meant repeating my past mistakes.
But a broken heart is hard to fix.
I pushed her away and said, “You can have this
place. I’ll rent somewhere else.”
<
I waincu vul.
69
She cried after me, “Gus, I’m sorry. I really am. I
won’t be stupid again this time.”
I sighed.
Why now?
Because I didn’t want to be too far from school,
I found another place nearby.
But that put me close to Joy again.
Sure enough, it hadn’t been a day since I moved in when Joy found out.
I don’t know where she got the key, but she had already made breakfast for me when I woke up.
I wanted to call my parents and give them a
piece of my mind.
Would they regret it if they knew I had died for
>
Joy last time?
Did they have to drive me to the edge again
and repeat the tragedy of my past life?
Joy smiled at me, “Gus, I made you buns. Come
eat.”
I looked at them, throw them in the trash, and
got some bread out of the fridge.
She didn’t get angry. She just picked the buns
out of the trash, wiped them off, and started
eating them.
I got angry and knocked them out of her hand.
“Are you crazy? They’re so dirty. Why are you eating that?”
I had hit her pretty hard. She rubbed her
swollen hand, but still smiled.
“It’s okay. They’re still edible. I’m not that
delicate.”
I was seeing the smile she used to save for
others for the first time.
But I hated it.
Was it pity? Or was she up to something?
What did she want from me?
What could I offer her?
Today was orientation.
I didn’t want to argue with her. I grabbed my
acceptance letter and left.
When I got to school, I went to register with the
advisor.
Joy showed up soon after.
:22
<
She was in the same department as me. Even
the same class!
Was she going to haunt me?
At the first class meeting, the advisor asked
everyone to introduce themselves.
I gave a quick introduction.
When it was Joy’s turn, she grabbed the mic
and looked at me.
I got chills. I had a bad feeling.
7
Joy started, “I wanted to go to NYU. But I
chose this school.”
“Because my partner said that his biggest
regret was not going to college in UCLA.”
<
“So, I gave up NYU and came here to find him.”
“I did a lot of things to hurt him last time, but
that wasn’t my intention. He always thought I
didn’t love him, but I’ve only ever had him in my
heart.”
