Chapter 11
All it took was one word from her: “Stop.” My wolf bared its teeth, and time ceased…Hit after hit rained down on her face, breaking her jaw. I tried to crush her skull with my bare hands, but I wasn’t strong enough then. I am now.
‘m not a life taker. I am a life bringer.
“Rya.” It’s the first time I have heard my name from his mouth. I actually stagger, dropping to a knee…the tears, they just come. My whole body is weeping, and I lose all the control that I have worked years on. Everything vanishes with just my name coming from his lips. I’m full–out sobbing, and I can’t even pick myself off the ground. Why?
No one save
one says a word…silence, complete silence.
This is not the picture I saw in my mind for myself. This is not how I wanted my first time seeing him to go.
Both of my hands are on the ground, clutching the earth to my flesh. I can see his shoes, his calves; they look so strong. Goosebumps ascend on his flesh where my gaze falls, his thighs. thick, his defined quads just peeking out of his shorts. I see their hands clasped together. This is just like a replay of my past.
I try to get up, but I fall back down. A gasp comes out of my mouth. I watch as his hand lets hers go to try and help me up off the ground. He takes a step toward me, her hand holding onto his forearm to try and stop him. He takes another step in my direction, and she pulls
him back toward her.
On my own, I get myself off the ground, standing, not looking at anyone. I hold my
shoulders back, raising my head, and my gaze travels up his chest. He’s shaking now. My. eyes reach his neck, mouth, nose. His eyes, pine green, stare hard at me. A moment passes between us…nothing else but he and I…
“Rya.” Again my name comes from his lips, again my legs shake…A hurricane is lashing the inside of my body…
I say nothing. Instead, I turn my back on him and walk away. I walk until I reach my car.
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Getting in, I struggle to find the right key for the ignition. Finally finding it. 1 dive why, even looking in the rearview mirror for fear I will see his eyes again.
Instead, I look ahead to what’s in front of me.
Grey clouds hide the sun’s light, and an eerie stillness settles around the lake. Even the birds are silent. Growling thunder gives its warning that a raucous storm is about to be
released.
Instead of walking, I decide to take the car, not trusting that I can make it to the clinic
before the rain comes.
The wind starts to rustle the leaves of the trees as I reach the clinic. The first few fat drops of rain hit my face before I walk through the front door. I feel my cheeks redden with the embarrassment of yesterday’s loss of control.
Aurora is there sipping a morning tea, the hot vapor of the steam hitting her face as she peers down into the cup. She looks up at me with eyes that see into me, not at me. Into me.
“You’re a mess.” Looking down at myself, I thought I looked presentable today, nice and tidy. Professional in every aspect. Touching my hair, I wonder if it has come out of its braid.
“Rya, what happened yesterday.”
“Aurora, it’s okay. It won’t happen again. I just lost control for a second. It was the first time I’ve seen him since I’ve been back. I’ll be more prepared next time. I’ll have better control” I try to say this so calmly as if this is true,
“I think we need to schedule some time to talk, just you and me. I know you’re a lot sicker than you think. You can’t see it, but I can. Your mind is not well. Your body is so healthy. but your mind needs help. I will help you. Just like you can help those pregnant females with their births, I can help you. Let me help you, Rya.”
I wasn’t expecting this first thing in the morning; my legs are glued to my spot. Eyes of light green stare at me, waiting for something to come out of my mouth. A flash of light from the window, followed by a loud boom that feels as if it’s inside the room, makes me jump slightly. The lights flicker on and off before staying on.
“The first step, Rya, is admitting you need help. Nothing is shameful in needing help. What’s
Chapter 11
shameful is you living your life the way you are. Your potential is limitless. The moon has blessed you. It’s my job now to help you see this.” The first stray tear leaks out.
“Where were you when I was a juvenile? Where were you?” I accuse her. She could have helped me then.
“Sometimes good people are meant to suffer. You learn from it, grow from it, become better from it. Now.
suffering needs to stop before it eats you and you can’t come back from it.”
Another flash of lightning lights the inside of the clinic.
