Are his eyes closed with the picture of me walking away from him?
In this moment, all I want him to remember is my back.
Cennedy
“Get out.”
Electrified pain hurts my nerve endings, anguish, curling my shoulders with his spoken
words.
“Get out!” His voice gets louder.
I uncurl my body away from his, my hatred for myself spreading inside like a malignant cancer that’s eating away at my insides.
Without another word, I walk out of his room and into mine, making sure I close the door
behind me.
It’s hard to face him, his hate so vicious it leaves a thick coating that clogs my pores so my skin has a hard time breathing.
Getting dressed in clothes that no longer fit my expanding body is just the tip of my own
humiliation.
I walk down the stairs. It’s mid–morning. Usually, I’m already up, starting on the mural I’m trying to finish before I go away.
The Luna is there talking with Rya. I keep my head down, unable to meet their eyes. My shame is too much to bear.
“How are feeling this morning, Kennedy?” The Luna is always pleasant with me, even though I know she can’t stand me in her home. She loves her son very much..
Chapter 101
‘Good, thank you for asking.” I still don’t meet their eyes as I take a seat at the table, fáking a piece of fruit. I don’t make myself anything to eat. I don’t go into their fridge or their cupboards. I only eat what is offered, and I think they are being too generous with someon
like me.
The peach is sweet, the way Rya smells. She’s always been sweeter; I just was too sour to
notice it.
A I was just thinking that we could go into town, seeing as Rya can’t train for a few days. I
thought maybe us females could have a shopping day?”
“I’m not sure.” Rya has hesitance in her voice. I know it’s because I’m invited.
“It’s okay, you females go. I have no money to go.” A wash of shame hits me. I have not money of my own. I never had to work before, and I’ve no savings, nothing to fall back on.
lly with
“Kennedy, you need new clothes. You’re going to grow out of those very fast, twins. We haven’t had twins in the pack for maybe fifty years. Besides, Cash has money. He has enough for you.” I nod my head, keeping it down.
get some near
“Rya, come. It would be fun to stuff. I don’t get the chance to go shopping. Maybe we could get something to eat after?” I can hear the excitement in the Luna’s voice while she speaks with Rya. There is never excitement in that voice when she speaks to me.
“If it’s money-”
“No, it’s not money. I have my own. It’s just that I don’t want to be around her.” Rya’s voice is hard to my ears, as it should be.
“I don’t blame you, Rya. If I were you, I’d feel the same way about me. I don’t know what to say to make things better for you. I don’t know what I could even possibly say for what I have done to you. Sorry isn’t good enough.” I let my words hang in the air, except they fall down like bricks smashing on the floor as soon as Cash walks into the room
I can’t look at him either, so I just keep my head down, hands in my lap. Trying not to cry, I pick the edges of my nails. I use to have beautiful nails, colorful long nails.
“Rya, you can do and feel whatever you want. I can’t even begin to understand how difficult this must be for you. I just thought that it would be nice to get out of the house. We
Chapter 104
all need to get stuff, so why not go together?”
“Where are you guys going?”
“Shopping,” Luna Grace says to Cash.
is eyes on
I don’t feel me anymore. It’s like I don’t even exist to him. I don’t blame him at
all.
“She going with you?”
“Yes, Kennedy’s coming. She needs money. Can you please give her some?” He huffs out a breath, heading upstairs before coming back to place his wallet in front of me.
I have to stop myself from bringing it to my nose, holding it there, and inhaling deeply from it. His scent is comforting. I can close my eyes and just pretend that things are different
between us.
“Take what you need.” That’s the most he’s spoken to me in a very long time. I just nod my head at him, unable to find my voice.
“Good, it’s settled. Let’s go. Rya, go get your purse. I’m driving!” She sounds slightly childish with her excitement.
Rya gets up, grumbling underneath her breath. I can’t hear what she’s saying, but I know it’s some slur directed at me.
I wait until the two females are ready. I don’t care what I look like; it’s not like I’m going to run into anyone I know or who even gives me a second glance
O(0)
