- 10.
The bowl of oatmeal trembled in my hands.
Before I could answer, she continued.
“I didn’t mean to look through your things. I was
getting you some clean clothes.”
<
12:41
I set down the bowl, watching as tears
streamed down her face. “I… I took him from
you. He should be yours. I… I stole five years
with him. I’m so sorry, Nina… so sorry…”
The kind girl in front of me was a mess of
tears. “Emily, you didn’t do anything wrong.
You love David. I loved my David. You didn’t
steal anything from me.”
“But David… he is your David!”
100
I shook my head, wiping her tears. “No. He’s
your David now. The one who loves you. The
one who loved me… he’s gone. I saved your life.
I didn’t do it so you could break off your
engagement.”
Emily stayed until Lisa returned. Her eyes were
still red when she left. Lisa went back to sleep,
promising to bring dinner later. I never expected
David to bring it instead.
<
100
When he walked in, I was grateful for the
makeup, but terrified my wig would slip. I adjusted it frantically while his back was turned.
The thermos contained egg drop soup, soft milk bread, and sweet and sour pork ribs. He must have been unsure what I could eat, because there were two portions. There was even a small container of sweet potato and cheese
casserole.
I desperately wanted to try his ribs. To see if he still used too much soy sauce. But my stomach could only handle a few spoonfuls of soup.
I sat in bed, David by the window. We were
silent, but it wasn’t awkward. There had been
times, waking up after an afternoon nap, me
playing my guitar by the window, him watching
me from the bed, not a word spoken, because
we understood each other.
My stomach, surprisingly cooperative, allowed
<
me to finish the soup. I reached for the
casserole. He picked it up and handed it to me.
“Thank you,” I said.
“You’re welcome. You saved Emily’s life. I
should be thanking you.”
The sweet potato and cheese tasted bitter.
I ate a few bites and pushed it away. I knew he
wanted to say something. But all he said was,
“Get well soon.” I should have said something
back. Congratulations. Best wishes. But I
couldn’t.
“Thank you. I hope you…” It took effort to
speak. “…have a good life.”
He looked so different now. Older, harder, his
features sharper, more severe.
He nodded, taking the thermos. My eyes
<
100
followed him as he left. The moment the door
closed, I pulled out the IV and hobbled to the window. He reappeared below, walking away. I drank in the sight of him, wanting to memorize it. This was the last time I would see him.
The next day was David and Emily’s wedding. I heard my seat was in the front row. But I was already on the train, heading back to Willow Creek. I’d bought the ticket days ago. My stomach started aching as soon as I sat down.
The pain was becoming more frequent. I knew what I’d asked Lisa to do was coming soon.
David had spoiled me. I’d become a wimp,
complaining about every little ache and pain.
His friends used to say he had a terrible
temper. But with me, he was all patience, even
when I was being unreasonable. He always held
me close, his voice a low rumble in my ear,
calling me “baby,” and the pain would vanish.
<
12:41
100
Now, the pain was sharp, bringing a cold sweat
to my forehead. I clutched my stomach, my
knuckles white.
He would have been so worried if he’d seen me
like this. He would have held me close, just like
when I cut my hand on broken glass in college,
murmuring reassurances until I calmed down.
But this pain… this was worse than any cut.
I slumped over the table, whispering his name.
“David… why aren’t you here to… make it
better?”
The train sped north. The painkillers kicked in,
and I fell asleep. I dreamt of high school, of
eighteen–year–old David, his eyes only for me.
The David who loved only me.
If there’s a next life, I hope the first person I
meet in my youth is David again.
