Love makes me wander
Chapter 1
For five years of marriage, Jason had cheated
on me at least fifty–two times. I’d swallowed it
all down, every single lie and betrayal.
Until I was nine months pregnant, and Jason’s
secretary screwed up with a major client. To
salvage the deal, he wanted me to go and
smooth things over with drinks and apologies.
I stared at him, disbelief hardening into anger.
“I’m carrying our child, Jason! You want me to
go out drinking? What if something happens?”
He cut me off, impatience dripping from his
voice. “It’s just drinks, Sarah. Relax, it’s not like
I’m asking you to go to war.”
He actually told the staff to pour drinks for me
even though I didn’t want to drink. That night I
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9:03
went into labor.
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That day, I almost died in the hospital. He spent the night with his secretary at a villa in the Hamptons.
I woke up after giving birth and looked at my mother–in–law. “You promised that if I had the baby, you’d agree to the divorce. Can I go
now?”
1
Hearing me say that, I saw a flicker of worry,
even pity in her eyes.
“Sarah, honey, are you sure you don’t want to
give him one more chance? He…”
Before she could finish, a piece of gossip
regarding Jason flashed on the TV in my
hospital room.
TI
–
<
The photo showed Jason carrying a woman out
of a car, her wearing his jacket.
She was leaning against his chest, eyes half-
closed, cheeks flushed an unnatural red.
While she was covered up pretty well, someone had managed to snap a shot of her smooth,
pale thigh, marked with what looked
suspiciously like love bites.
No explanation was necessary.
“CEO of Hawthorne Industries spotted getting
cozy with mystery woman. Wedding bells on the
horizon, perhaps?” the anchor droned.
My mother–in–law, bless her heart, visibly
deflated. She gasped for breath, her face red
with anger.
But when she looked at me, all I saw was guilt
and compassion.
<
Tears welled up in her eyes, and the words of
persuasion she was trying to form got stuck in
her throat.
Finally, she choked out, “Okay, Sarah. I promise
you, I’ll help you get a divorce.”
Seeing her struggle to hold back tears, I felt a
pang of guilt.
But I didn’t back down. “Thank you, Mrs.
Hawthorne.”
After the baby was born, I couldn’t bring myself
to look at him.
All I knew was that he was a boy, just under five
pounds, pale and fair–skinned, and looked a lot
like me.
The nurse came in again, reminding me that he
was past his observation period. After the
<
examination, she confirmed that he was healthy
and well.
She urged me to see him, the precious baby I’d risked my life to bring into the world.
But I shook my head. “No, thank you. It’s good
to know he’s healthy.”
If I didn’t see him, I wouldn’t be tempted to
stay.
I knew that if I looked at him, I’d never be able
to leave him.
But I couldn’t stay with Jason, either.
He’d be better off staying in the Hawthorne
family.
Lying in the hospital bed, I looked out at the
view, wondering where I would go.
୮
I was abandoned at birth, raised in an
orphanage.
I had no family, no friends I could rely on.
lt like a small sailboat in the ocean.
mother–in–law felt bad for me, and was
urious at Jason’s inaction. She pulled out her
phone and tried calling him, hoping he’d come
see us.
But she got an automated voice every time.
Finally, on her last try, someone answered.
But it was a woman.
“Mrs. Hawthorne, Jason’s in a meeting. Can you
call back later?”
Before she could respond, a soft moan came
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As if she hadn’t guessed what they were doing, she was livid. “You tell Jason that if he still
considers me his mother, he’d better get to this
hospital now, or I’ll pretend I never gave birth to him!” she yelled.
She hung up the phone, eyes glistening with tears. She took my hand and said, “I’m so sorry, Sarah. I shouldn’t have forced you to stay with
him. I put you through so much pain.”
