Janie, no longer in pain, leaned in
conspiratorially, pulling out a small bag of
pills. “I met a nice lady outside. She has a
secret family recipe for having a son.
I looked down. Gender–selection pills.
Janie, I’m not as smart as you. What are
those?”
“These are miracle pills! You’ve never seen
these before. Doctors only know Western
medicine. They don’t understand traditional
remedies.”
“These folk remedies are so good, hospitals
<
Inese TOIK remedies are so good, nospitals
hide them so they don’t lose business. Bad
money drives out good money, you know?”
I smiled. “Oh, Janie, you’re so smart. I get it
now.‘
Janie, remembering I was also a doctor, quickly hid the pills as if I might steal them. I was a surgeon, but I knew these scams. They preyed on the gullible.
Last time, I’d begged Janie not to listen to these quacks. I’d even pulled strings to get
her proper prenatal care.
Not this time.
<
NOL LEI 10.
Maybe it was the pills, but Janie didn’t deliver
until 41 and a half weeks. In our small town,
the best OB–GYNs were at the hospital she’d
been banned from. She ended up at a smaller hospital, giving birth on a cot next to the
bathroom.
The baby was a boy, larger than average,
broad–faced, with a high nose and thick lips.
Mom declared him blessed, her opinion of
Janie instantly improving.
Possibly due to the pills, Janie’s recovery was
slow. Mom wanted me to help with
postpartum care, since I was a doctor.
<
–
5
I shook my head, frowning. “Different
specialties, Mom. I’m a surgeon. What if I
mess something up and Janie can’t have
another son?”
Mom, horrified by the thought, agreed. She
also
- Warned me to stay away from the baby.
Women were “yin,” and I might disrupt the
baby bou“yang” energy.
So I became a ghost. No replies to texts, no
advice, just quietly moving my assets, even
sending my dogs to my boyfriend’s place.
When Janie’s postpartum confinement ended,
Mom, unwilling to bathe her or hire help,
<
Mom, unwilling to bathe her or hire help,
called me. I was curious to see the state of
her and the baby.
Janie looked pale and drawn, not the healthy
glow of a new mother. As I bent to run the
bathwater, she sneered, “Amy, I saw your
How many boyfriends have you had?”
“A woman’s virtue is her most valuable asset.
Even if he’s handsome and has a nice body, men care if you’re not a virgin.” She puffed up slightly. “Mark and I were each other’s first. Even after all these years, he said I was
like a virgin on our wedding night. He
checked with a flashlight! He was so
pleased.” She beamed. “That’s what a good
L
pleased.” She beamed. “That’s what a good
woman is.
I processed this. They…had sex during
postpartum confinement…and mistook the
bleeding…for virginity? Janie’s stupidity
continued to astound me. No wonder she was
anemic. Probably prolonged lochia, causing
problems.
As a woman, I should’ve felt sympathy. But all
I felt was…schadenfreude.
“You’re so virtuous, Janie. I can’t compare.”
Janie preened, as if morally superior.
く
Janie preened, as if morally superior.
Mark came home from work, saw the blood,
and froze. “She’s still bleeding? Amy, check
her out! Should we go to the hospital?”
Janie giggled, pushing him playfully. Seeing
their loving display, I knew I wasn’t needed.
“Don’t call her ‘Amy‘! It’s embarrassing! This
is all your fault…”
While they were…occupied, I checked on the baby. As expected, he hadn’t grown much, his face thinner than at birth. He heard me and
started wailing. Janie and Mark were busy re- enacting their wedding night. They hadn’t fed
く
NUNY. TO VAPOULOU, TO
mudi, mIO
face thinner than at birth. He heard me and
started wailing. Janie and Mark were busy re-
enacting their wedding night. They hadn’t fed
him. He was starving.
But I wasn’t saying a word.
Mark came running. “He’s so fussy! Always
crying or sleeping! No one can soothe him. It’s so strange.”
“Amy, you’re a doctor! Can you get a
pediatrician to see him?”
I smiled reassuringly. “Mark, even his cries
are louder than other babies! He’s full of yang
energy! That’s a good thing! Don’t worry!”
く
are louder than other babies! He’s full of yang
energy! That’s a good thing! Don’t worry!”
Mark seemed relieved.
Janie rushed in, picked up the baby, trying to
comfort him. The starving infant latched onto
her breast, biting hard. She yelped. Then, she
looked at Mark, a coy look on her face. “I just
fed him half an hour ago… He must be
jealous you’re stealing his food!”
Her cheesy romance novel lines made me
want to vomit. I escaped to the kitchen.
Minutes later, Janie followed, grabbing
formula from the cupboard. “I don’t want
く
Minutes later, Janie followed, grabbing
formula from the cupboard. “I don’t want
Mark to be jealous. I’ll give the baby some
formula.‘
Formula is usually introduced around six
months. This baby was barely a month old. He
was in for a rough ride.
Mom heard about the formula feeding and
went ballistic. She stormed into my house,
slapping Janie. “Formula at his age! You’re
trying to starve my grandson!”
“You accuse me falsely! You are my elder. I
will accept your chastisement.‘
<
“You accuse me falsely! You are my elder. I
will accept your chastisement.”
Helen, bless her heart, wasn’t playing with a
full deck, but she could mostly take care of
herself.
She was trying on a gold necklace, and the
saleslady said, “If you break it, you buy it.
Helen, God love her, took that as a challenge.
Snap!
I paid. She actually chewed me out for butting
- in.
The doctor said 104°F water for formula.
<
She ran the tap to 104°F and dumped it
straight in.
I tried explaining, and she swore I was trying
to hurt her precious baby boy.
Later, she tried to give her one–year–old a
gummy bear. I stopped her.
That night, her son died. Gastroenteritis.
She blamed me for the gummy bear incident.
Then she killed me.
I woke up. Back in the jewelry store. Necklace
day.
L
“You said if I broke it, I bought it! What’s the
deal?” Helen yelled, seven months pregnant
and wanting a gold necklace for her unborn
child.
The saleslady had indeed uttered those
words. Helen, in her infinite wisdom,
interpreted them…creatively. She snatched
the broken necklace, pocketed it, and now
refused to pay.
Pregnant and entitled, that was Helen. Earlier,
at Starbucks, she’d complained her
Frappuccino wasn’t frappéd enough and
demanded a refund. Now, righteousness
radiated off her.
